And by vain I mean both futile and narcissistic. A couple of weeks ago I had my nails done. The theory was that it would keep me from biting or picking at my fingernails, and look good at the same time.
So, not really sure that it truly succeeded on either end. What it really did was make my hands, which are (in keeping with the rest of my physique) on the large side to begin with, look freakishly huge. No kidding, I think the nails looked good from a distance, but up close, geez, they look like I could hit 2 octaves on a piano, or palm a basketball. Remember the “man hands” episode on Seinfeld? Yeah, it was a little more like “tran hands” around here. Not a good look.
And the nail biting/picking thing. It helped a little, but not enough to make the inconvenience of having to have make sure my nails were polished, and not even close to worth constantly having to dig the dirt out from under the talons. Let’s not get into what would happen when I would make bread. Kneading and nails do not mix. Perhaps I should have just sat around on cushions eating bon bons, there is no dirt involved .
That’s it, my brief foray into glamour is over. That childhood fantasy of being a beauty queen, just not all it is cracked up to be. Back to the slightly grubby Sandie you all know and love. Ahhhh.