It’s been a day. A long hard gut wrenching day.
Really, in some ways it’s been a long (almost) 2 years. In that time:
One of my kids learned the hurt that careless words can inflict. How things can never be unsaid. And more importantly, can never be unheard. And that the scars left, though not visible, are deep and forever.
One of my kids learned when an excellent job is expected, doing an adequate job is not enough. And that adequate job has to be done over, with excellence. And dreams get put on hold.
One of my children learned that one can work so hard, put in all the effort, and if someone else doesn’t do their part, the hard work means nothing. And there is nothing to do, but continue to work hard, work harder.
And I have learned, it’s impossible to soften the blows.
Today, all I could do was listen.
Listen while one child raged against their body, which seemingly refuses to cooperate, despite countless hours of training.
Listen while one child expressed excitement, tempered by trepidation, as they set off on a voyage to an exotic, hostile destination.
Listen while one child wept. Wrenching sobs as friends were sentenced to real prison time for crimes committed out of desperation.
And I wonder, was there something I could have done to protect them? To shield them from this pain?